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New Years Type Things

January 4, 2012

So this is going to be one of those long posts without any pictures in which I reveal too much (making it, perhaps, much more interesting for you, but much more stressful for me). I started the post the other day and then scrapped it, thinking it’d be too personal to post, but somehow I keep coming back to it. Maybe cause it’s helpful to declare your intentions publicly, to commit to keeping them. Let this be a Declaration of Intentions for 2012 then, or at least a search for the articulation thereof.

Perhaps out of nowhere for you, I need to mention the Etsy shop, which is currently under withandagainst but should probably or obviously be renamed Betsy on Etsy due to the wild popularity of that moniker. Right now it’s just selling the Brooklyn Notebook and is, I need to stress, completely not financially viable (confession number 1: due to inexperience and un-self confidence, I priced it way too low).  No matter. The point is, it’s a first tip-toe into the world of Etsy and though, like any great project, I cannot possibly foresee the amount of work it would take to get a substantial income off Etsy… I sort of see it as conceivable for me to go down that road. Which I am not saying I am going to do anytime soon.

Why is that important?

I really desire the ability to financially support myself . And ideally in a manner that could allow me to live , eventually, somewhat off the grid. In my head, this meant, obviously, freelancing.

Ok, ok, ok, this might reveal some faulty logic here. But what freelancing meant for me as well was learning how to design for the middle. Middle America. Which I love voraciously and probably, it would seem, as an exotic fruit. But let’s face it. I am not that good at doing Middle America. I love Middle America and Middle America loves me, but as visitors. I am not the designer who would be particularly good at designing a Target ad. I’ve known this always (obvs.) but didn’t want to reference it here, on my semi-job related blog, but who are we kidding. Nobody is going to hire me to design for Target so I can scream it from the heights of Varick St: it is not a surprise to anyone.

So basically I was sort of pushing myself in this Middle America path with interesting results, but a lot of the pushing was a bit unnatural. And a lot of the pushing was sort of just motivated by fear, in the most blunt way to put it, though I don’t think that bluntness does it justice. Because as I do stress, I have quite sincere love and respect for the middle and a part of me, of course, yearns to be more part of it. But there was that financial side, too.

Anywho, so I feel like Etsy releases that valve for me somehow. I can run away off the grid and not necessarily freelance but run my own Etsy shop.

I know, I know, but I shall admit and own up to my piles of irrationality where others will falter.

So letting that Middle America design aspect go a bit — or rather, channeling it into Etsy to make CASH MONEY for me — will perhaps allow the  design that I don’t do for Etsy to free up as well. To be wilder and crazier and chaoticer. I love all my projects, but thinking strategically, I think it’s my skills of making sense chaotically that seem to excite people. If that makes any sense. I am always drawn to minimalism, but I am actually not that great at it. I want peace and order but I think the orderly people are drawn to my chaos, especially when I somehow make sense of it. So let me pursue that more, see where it goes.

So I guess a design resolution for the New Year is to follow my gut more. Which may be every creative person’s resolution, but still, I shall embrace it like I am the first to have that brilliant idea.

___

I think there is a gloss here, a little bit. It’s tricky because I am drawn to order and clarity and concepts. But I see I do better when those elements naturally evolve in my work (or just instinctively) rather than foisted upon them. So it’s tricky, tricky. To follow my gut and to push my gut to speak loudly. And trust that it all makes sense in the end!

 

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